For most of my life I have been a talker. I have come to realize that I actually talked over others. I thought that my words were important. I had an answer or words for every conversation. When my body started to break/slow down I was hearing differently. I was listening intently to other's word and their feelings. When someone asked "how is your day?" or " how are you feeling?" they really don't want for one to go into a discourse of their life. They want just a nod of the head or the reply " my day is fine" or simply the word 'okay'. Or how often had you asked-' do you need anything?' We all know that you are not going to get anything for them. It is only a polite question without action on our part.
However I now not only nod the head but also state' NO! how are you really feeling?' Once those words are spoken the second time you are telling the other, I really do want to know. You are saying I am concerned. Or the question do you need anything? Emphasis the point that you really do want to do an errand for them. State do you need any pills from the drugstore or do you want some chicken soup? You can further state that "listen I am going to the drugstore or I am going to the corner market. It is not bother to pick up something extra."
We have become a society who just speak words without meaning, without truly caring.
I daily face pain. I daily feel useless. I am sick and have become a burden. I had to retire early because I cannot handle the long drive day after day. I am no longer the bread winner. So when I can help someone,it makes me part of the society once again. Having been forced to slow down not only my body but also my hearing, I understand what it means to be sickly and the attitude of feeling lowly, of no use.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote;
'to laugh often and love much;
To win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children;
to earn the approval of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to give of one's self without the slightest thought of return;
to have accomplish a task, whether by a healthy child, a recused soul, a garden patch or redeemed social condition;
to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exaltation;
To know that even one;
To know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived;
This is to have succeeded.'
With a wink and a nod HeWal